How (Not) To Pick Up Girls

My lovely friend Vicki visited Hong Kong in January. She and I were sitting outside Starbucks one day and I noticed one of the workers kept looking over. Soon enough he came over for a chat. First he said something in Cantonese, and I replied that I don’t actually know Chinese. He then made small talk about if we’re from Hong Kong, are we staying nearby, etc. Then, he leaned down, and whispered in my ear…

1. What did the worker whisper in Becca’s ear?
a) Can I have your phone number?
b) Do you have a boyfriend?
c) Are you a lesbian?

If you guessed C, you got it! I skillfully resisted the urge to burst out laughing and replied that no, I am in fact not a lesbian. He went off with a small smile on his face. I told Vicki what he had asked and then the laughter was had. Later he came out again still wearing a stupid smile and with free coffee for both of us. We drank the coffee and ran away before his shift finished and he tried ‘talking’ with us again.

So yes. That now ranks as the worst pick-up line I have ever heard. Some guys had a different take on it though – apparently if you’re going to give a girl free coffee it’s worth making sure she’s not a lesbian first.

38 CommentsJump to comments form

  • Justin said,
    March 27, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Oh wow. That’s hillarious! I actually guess C because the other two were just like.. things that would be normal, obviously it wasn’t going to be something normal If I were you, and I was walking away, and he like, asked me to come back, I’d be like “No! You thought I was a lesbian!” and ran away haha.

  • Ashley said,
    March 27, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    I don’t think I would have been able to fight the urge to laugh. I probably would have cracked up laughing and accidently spit in face while doing so or something. But I agree with Justin, it would have been even more so halarious if you had been like “No! You thought I was a lesbian!” and then ran away. Could you imagine the look on his face if you had done that? lol

  • mendifae said,
    March 27, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    so glad to see you’re back and the theme is beautiful! Love the pictures of you and your friend, looks like you guys were having way too much fun! Great story about the waiter too but yeah, I would have laughed in his face!Welcome back!

  • Jenny said,
    March 27, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    i think i would have died laughing then told him “Yes. Yes I am!”

  • DENIEL said,
    March 27, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    I actually guess C

  • Jess said,
    March 27, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Hahahaha… that’s great!! That’s the worst pick-up line I’ve ever heard. The waiter ought to be ashamed of himself! BTW, lovely new layout. I love the colors.

  • Hannah said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Haha, that’s so funny! What a dumbo, only a crazy person would ask that LOL I’m still laughing Anyways, I took a smilie set – will credit. Thanks

  • Ayu said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    haha that’s funny. xD —nice site. i love your layout.

  • Aaron said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Hahahaha!!! I’ll try and remember that one if I’m ever single again… or maybe I’ll get one of my friends to use it!

  • Cherry said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Haha, indeed the worst pick-up line but hey, at least you and your friend got the free coffee! By the way, I like this layout, especially the colors.

  • Crystal said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    lol..i would say yes if he isnt cute..

  • psycho said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    My goodness! Is that even suppose to be a pick up line?

  • Ersalina said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    I’d have been staring at him with my eyes totally bulged out. How can a person actually ask that? It’s uh- totally ludicrous lol. If someone comes over and asks me if I am a lesbian, I will make sure:1) Guy: He will NEVER stay as a normal guy again.2) Gal: I’d reply: “Heh. You interested in joining?” Had been looking out for you and your site these few days. I love your smilies.

  • Benedick said,
    March 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Hi, I sent you an e-mail! Please answer. Thanks.

  • valerie said,
    March 29, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Ah hahahahaha ;-) Very strange indeed!

  • Lara said,
    March 29, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Haha Becca!

  • Lara said,
    March 29, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Oh and OF COURSE this theme is beautiful! (I just realized my message got cut off for some silly reason above ) I said: *heart* that you’re back, and that story made me giggle very loud.

  • Jennifer said,
    March 29, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    now that’s a pickup line I dont hear everyday! welcome back by the way

  • Rosemarie said,
    March 29, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    I told Shaun and he thought it was a pretty good line.Bah, men.

  • Elea said,
    March 29, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    As opposed to, “Are you taken?” right? I guess you can be straight AND taken, and it’d be more worthwhile to buy you coffee than if you’re just a lesbian, eh?

  • larry h. said,
    March 30, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Hello there, I know it’s pretty off topic but I just to come by and compliment you on the Thirteen theme for WordPress. I’m loving it and its bloody beautiful. Keep up the good work.

  • Jordie said,
    April 1, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    LOL, well you have to give the poor fella points for… originality? It might be dumb, but it’s the *funniest* pick-up line I’ve ever heard. And you got free coffee to boot. Dammit, I wish someone would give me free coffee. Especially Gloria Jeans coffee. Best coffee ever.

  • Draicone said,
    April 6, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Very interesting, although I suggest a pickup line like “Sprechen sie deutsch?” – more provocative

  • stuart said,
    April 9, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    as a bloke, im not sure whether to feel asahemd or amused! omg. tell you what, you should have said yes, given Vicki a little peck (!) and then walked off – leaving him ion a totally confused state thinking ‘damnit’.or is that just wrong?! sorry! good on you!

  • Ron said,
    April 10, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    *slapping head* OMG so good advice*putting in note pad advice to self about picking up ladies* #37 37 do not ask….:)nice siteI”m in chicago chicago btw dunno how I stumbled on ur site though

  • Rosie said,
    April 11, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    that is too too funny…like someone else said… I think I would have had to poke the dog a little. Instead of saying yes or no, I might have answered something like, “I alternate, what day is it?” or “Well, I like girls too, does your sister work here?” Hope the coffee was good

  • Frodo's Dragon said,
    April 11, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Alternative response:“yes, why? Do you want a date?”

  • jpmcc said,
    April 15, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    The worst line I have ever heard was at a Christmas office party for insurance salesman. One rather inebriated guy was busy chatting up a girl, and seemed to be making considerable progress. However, he blew it with his closing line: “How about coming back to my place? I haven’t had a good redhead since my wife died!”

  • huyzer said,
    April 16, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Holy smokes. LOL. Nice move guy!

  • Jasper said,
    May 23, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Unreal … still people that’s so narrow-minded with that kind of pickup line?But thanks 4 sharing :-)

  • eadward said,
    June 12, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Great job guys… Thank for you work…

  • pik said,
    June 18, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Thanks for this piece of advises. At least, the silly boy didn’t ask you the too known question like: “Do you still live with your parents ?”In switzerland, the most used opening sentence is: “T’es à l’uni ?” (Do you study at the university?)

  • Sime said,
    September 6, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Haha wow that was funny

  • Mike Bronner said,
    October 29, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    you all go out of your ways to pretend being angry/confused about the lesbian question. What’s so weird about it. Guess you don’t even take the pain of thinking about that guy’s situation and that perhaps it’s jsut fun for him too.

  • Chad said,
    December 11, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Funny stuff!

  • lineage2 said,
    December 16, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    (smiled) works good )

  • Kyle said,
    December 18, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    Considering my pua skills, I’d say ‘are you single” and not “do you have a boyfriend”

  • Anonymous said,
    December 28, 2006 7 years, 60 days ago

    i would laugh my ass off thats hilarious danm.

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